|
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE—AP (ALL PLANETS)
WIRELESS NETWORKS, A SERVICE OF GALAXYCOM AND COMING SOON TO AN
ASTEROID OR SPACE STATION NEAR YOU
The following transcript is excerpted from a recent
broadcast from the ABC (Andromeda Broadband Constellation) News
Department. This broadcast was received throughout the Milky Way
Galaxy over a variety of GalaxyCom-enabled media, including DT,
Inc.’s Wristband Personal Communicators, Jetson Corporation’s
Integrated Transport Windshield Monitors, and REM’s Subliminal
Sleep-State Storage Systems (pioneering the latest in Saturn S5
technology). GalaxyCom is the universe’s largest telecommunications
provider and is the result of recent mergers of AT&T, MCI/WorldCom,
Sprint, and the few remaining Regional Bell Operating Companies
brought back together during a heated shareholders’ proxy battle
championed by the spirit apparition of Judge Harold Greene.
"Good evening, I am cryogenically preserved Hugh
Downs, and this is 20/20—not just the television news program,
but also the year 2020!!
Tonight we want to take a look at the some of the
recent developments taking place in the inter-galactic financial
services industry.
First, from Planet Earth, now popularly referred to
as Helios+3, tomorrow will bring us the introduction of the first
truly global currency standard to be used worldwide. Following over
two decades of successful assimilation of the Euro throughout economic
systems in the Western Hemisphere, The World Bank will be rolling
out the much-heralded Terra. Unlike all previous forms of monetary
units, the Terra will exist in only electronic form, ranging from
being stored on Personal Valuation Cards (PVC’s, popularly
called Plastic) to Cyber Procurement Units (CPU’s) for Internet-based
Electronic Commerce. In the United States, the Terra will replace
those dirty old paper dollars used in mattress stuffing, thus forever
severing all ties to the historically debated Gold Standard of the
previous millennium. Counting on his fingers, Fed Chairman Allen
Greenspan, a fellow cryogenarian, enumerated 17 ways that digital
currency would enhance the payments systems and concluded that Woodrow
Wilson could have had a lot more impact utilizing 21st
Century biotechnology developments.
In a related story, the US Treasury Department finally
revealed that Fort Knox never really existed and that the past fifty
years of unprecedented economic growth had been fueled by the myth
that the US Government really held gold assets to back up its paper
currency! "We sure fooled you guys into thinking we had any
control of monetary policy," chuckled Mr. Greenspan as he boarded
his personal Space Shuttle for an extended vacation at his resort
on Jupiter.
Finally tonight, we have news on a study about the
evolving efficiencies of the banking system. From a universe of
over 15,000 US banks in the 1970’s to less than 20 world-wide
banks just a few years ago, the industry has now embraced both technological
and regulatory change that has increased the number of financial
institutions to almost 500 billion! Yes, now every household on
this planet and elsewhere possesses the capability to operate its
own bank branch in the comfort of its own living quarters. Financial
services are purchased via auction over sites enabled by technology
from GalaxyCom Internet Banking Services, Inc. Community banking
has indeed survived, and has taken its ultimate form—a community
bank charter in every household, thus recognizing that personal
one-to-one customer service, not the commoditized banking products
offered universally, is the true differentiation factor in today’s
banking world. Community banking really does mean convenience after
all.
Thank you for watching, wherever you are. For 20/20,
this is Hugh Downs, saying, thanks to GalaxyCom, we are in touch,
so you be in touch."
SUBMITTED BY:
CALVIN D. JOHNSON
Electronic Commerce Strategies
404.633.3540
cdjohnson@ecstrategies.net
|
